Tuesday, June 5, 2007

retail shmetail

So, I went on a job interview today. Looked well-dressed, but not too well-dressed. (See previous blog about fashion requirements.) Wore high heels, but switched them out for the flip-flops I conveniently hid in my purse until after the interview was over and I was out the door. Ah, Florida.

Interview wasn't too difficult, just your run of the mill questions about availability, previous work experience and such. And you know, it has become apparent that teaching has really given me the opportunity to become a fabulous on-the-spot bullshitter. For instance, my boss might say "So, Ms. L-, what does this diagnostic data in comparison with last year's GPA for student Joe Bob tell you?" to which I would instantly reply, "Let's see...his scores are high, yet his grades are low. Clearly, Joe Bob is in need some organizational strategies in combination with and effort to enhance his intrinsic motivation. I believe he would benefit best in a classroom where differentiated instruction happens daily, so he does not become disengaged and elect to be unsuccessful." Which is a fancy way of saying, Joe Bob is a lazy, hormonal monster. (And has mean parents...who names a kid Joe Bob???)

So, I was a little surprised when the girl doing my interview asked me a question that left me all-a-fluster! We were chatting about previous work experience (she wanted only to know about my full-time work when I was in school, not the my current career) when she says, "So. You don't have any retail experience."

Well, duh.

Thus, I began to panic. How is it possible that I, Captain Overachiever of the Super Success Squad, did not prepare an explanation to compensate for my obvious lack of t-shirt folding capabilities?!?!

Naturally, I bust out with something idiotic. Teaching hasn't been able to help me this oral issue yet.

"Well, no. I do not have retail experience. But I have a college degree."

As if this matters to someone looking to hire a person to run a register, open dressing rooms, and sell jeans. For what I doubt pays more than $7.50 an hour.

Oh well. Tomorrow, on advice from good friend Steph, I will call Sylvan. A place where my education-lingo-twisting will prove much more useful.

Until payday,

p.s. HEY - where is my Capt. Overachiever cape?? I have held this position my entire life, yet, no cape. Or fancy underwear to wear as outerwear. Ripoff.


James Dziezynski said...

Hey-- I jumped over to your blog since Steph is gone for the week! Had to waste tim--err I mean enlightnen my horizons by reading something.

I hear ya about the job hunt. I'm looking for something better myself, I've been waiting to hear back from a few places. A while back I had to work at Petsmart for a short time to make ends meet--so you have my sympathy and good luck finding something you like :)

Hilary said...

hmmm...., pretty offensive comment if you ask someone who spent 8 years of their life working in retail.

The Working Girl said...

Didn't mean to offend...basically I felt stupid for trying to reason out my lack of retail with a degree - obviously she could have cared less and I don't blame her, I wasn't what she needed. That's all. My apologies......