Therapist: Well, I think instead of scheduling your next appointment, we should just wait and see how this month goes.
Me: What are you saying?
Therapist: I think you've made significant progress. You've come to some very poignant understandings during our time together. And, frankly, we just spent twenty minutes discussing the weather.
Me: So, you don't want to see me anymore?
Therapist: No, that's not it. I just don't know if I see a reason for our meetings to continue on a weekly basis.
Me: Listen, I've heard this line before. The old "It's not you, it's me" routine. Well, no shit. It is me. I'm the one who made the first appointment. I'm a mess. Don't you see? I still need you.
Therapist: Actually, I don't think you do.
Me: Don't you tell me who I am or what I need!
Therapist: This is not about needing. This is not about personal identity. I am trying to tell you that you came to me with certain goals and I believe you have achieved them.
Me: Fine. (Huff.)
Therapist: You look upset.
Me: I am upset! I really thought we had a good thing going!!!
Therapist: We do! We can still have sessions occasionally.
Me: Yeah, when you're not too busy with a new client. I came here for help reconciling ending relationship and here you are putting an end to us!
Therapist: Maybe we do need to keep seeing each other. Is next Thursday good for you?
Me: Well, if you insist.
wg
6 comments:
lol. Love it!
Is it bad if I think this is hilarious?
I love your therapy sessions. :) Perhaps you should have a summer fling to provide fodder for future sessions?
brilliant. :-)
LOL, yes Em, sometimes I find myself in certain situations and think, "Well, if this ends up crappy, at least it will result in good blog fodder and therapy topics."
I need to find a therapist like yours ... :)
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